


I'll Hold You While You Cry

by TwistedSamurai



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Angst, Gen, Implied/Referenced Torture, Nightmares, Past Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-06
Updated: 2020-05-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:55:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24033892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TwistedSamurai/pseuds/TwistedSamurai
Summary: Tseng wakes up in the middle of the night, with memories of Kadaj in the back of his mind. He tries to maintain his composure, and keep calm. But Rufus is having none of his words. Neither is Reno.
Relationships: Reno/Tseng (Compilation of FFVII), Rufus Shinra/Tseng
Kudos: 35





	1. Even If It's Just a Whisper

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this thanks to a friend and I having a headcanon that Tseng gave Kadaj his and Elena's phones, and the passwords. So here's this hot mess of Tseng sobbing because he needs to cry sometime

_“Oh, the dog is finally going to try and bite back?” Kadaj stepped back a little, as Tseng stayed protectively in front of Elena. He could barely stand at this point, but he wasn’t going to let them hurt her. His vision was already blurry from pain, and his hands shook a bit, but he wasn’t moving. This was his fault-  
Kadaj moved faster than Tseng could see and suddenly he was sent sprawling sideways. He gasped or air as his body slowly registered the kick Kadaj had delivered to his side. A tried to get a hand under himself, and push back up, but let out a low cry as a heel dug into the side of his neck, pressing down._

_“You know if you told us where Mother was, we could leave you be.” Kadaj commented, and Tseng tried to move again as he saw Elena knocked to the ground. “If not…”_

_“Elena-” Tseng croaked. ___

__\--------------_ _

__“Leave her alone!” Tseng’s eyes snapped open. He didn’t move, waiting to hear a scream, a snicker- anything. He gasped for air, one hand reaching up to realize that there was nothing around his neck. No heel digging in and pushing him into the dirt that was already covered in their blood. He wasn’t look up at the trees, at the Forbidden city.  
Silence. He was alone._ _

__Or, almost alone. He heard movement to his left and sat up instantly, reaching for his gun as he saw light hair. He froze as cobalt blue eyes met his own. Rufus said nothing as he quietly pushed the gun a little further away, setting down the mug of tea. Tseng simply stared, watching the blonde to see what he would do. He didn't even lower his hand, simply swallowed and stared up at him._ _

__Rufus sighed softly, sitting on the edge of the bed. It unnerved him, seeing the calm and stoic Director looking at him like a frightened and lost puppy. “…. Tseng.” He opened his arms a bit, silently offering the other a hug._ _

__It didn’t take anymore words- Tseng jumped him, burying his face into Rufus’ shoulder, and Rufus frowned as he realized that the brunette was sobbing. Not little hiccups but full breathless tears. He pet the others hair, not saying a word as he simply let him cry, resting his chin on top of the turks head._ _

__“I’m sorry.” Tseng sobbed out, and Rufus stilled, listening. He couldn’t be seriously apologizing for a nightmare. “I’m sorry I failed, I let them-“_ _

__“Enough.” Rufus ordered, and Tseng bit back another sob, but didn’t move. “I will not hear another word on that… You do not owe me any apologies. You completed your mission and you came back to me alive, Tseng. That is what I asked of you.” He kept his tone gentle, holding the other against him. “That was what I asked, and you did it.”_ _

__“I gave them a way to get to you.” Tseng protested before Rufus could cut him off again. “They used it. You almost got hurt.”_ _

__“Tseng. Look at me.” Rufus tilted his face up, holding his chin. Gaia, he hated the tears that were still falling down those cheeks. He couldn’t help but lean in and kiss at them, frowning. “Listen carefully. You are here. You are alive. You were near death. That does not in any way lead to apologies.” He murmured and Tseng nodded. “I know you feel as though this is on you, as the Director of these men, but it was not. Your fault. You did far better than the others would have done in your position and made sure that you kept quiet, despite…” He trailed off. Tseng and Elena had not talked about what happened, and he wasn’t going to push._ _

__“…. Thank you.” Tseng whispered into the silence, pressing his lips against Rufus’ before pulling back. “… I should… Drink the tea. Before it gets cold.”_ _

__“Yes… I heard Jasmine helps with these things.” Rufus didn’t let go of Tseng’s waist as he grabbed the cup and passed it to him. “So drink it before we go back to sleep. I’ll make sure Reno doesn’t wake you when he gets out of bed.”_ _

__Tseng nodded, leaning against Rufus as he took a few sips. Rufus pulled the cup from his hands as he started to nod off again._ _

__Tseng didn’t have a nightmare for the rest of the night, his face pressed against Rufus’ chest and listening to his heartbeat as he finally got a night’s rest without that horrible vision coming back._ _


	2. Or You Just Need to Scream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reno wakes up with Tseng this time, and he's furious that he couldn't do more for him. But he's going to do what he can to help.

_“You think you’re so fucking tough don’t you? Useless fucking Shinra lapdog.” Kadaj snarled and Tseng finally let out a low noise of pain as the kick sent him rolling a little._

_How long had the remnants been at this? It felt like forever. He couldn’t feel most of his body, and his vision was blurred from pain, and the blood dripping from a cut on his head. He was silent again as a hand gripped his hair, forcing him to lift his head._

_“Now. I’ll ask again. Where. Is. She.” Kadaj snarled. The turk refused to answer him, however, and he felt something hit the side of his head before he fell sideways as he heard Elena scream- No, he had to protect her, it was his fault- ___

__\------------------_ _

__“Elena no!” Tseng bolted upright, gasping for air and looking around. The vision faded from the terror he had seen, and he slowly came to realize he was not in the Forgotten City anymore. His forced himself to take a few deep breaths and jumped a bit as there was movement beside him. He focused on the shock of red hair. No, that wasn’t a remnant, or Elena, it was…_ _

__“Hey… Hey s’okay man… I’m sittin up.” Reno mumbled softly, rubbing sleep from his eyes. Or, acting like it. He had heard Tseng whimpering in his sleep, but he knew better than to try and touch him or shake him awake, even though he just wanted to pull the other into his arms and hold him as tightly as he could. So, he had simply stayed as still as possible, waiting for Tseng to wake up like he usually did when it came to these nightmares._ _

__He frowned as he studied the Director, who was still watching him like a deer in headlights. He cursed himself every time he saw that look, *wishing* he’d been the one to stay behind instead of Elena. He could have fought off the others, saved Tseng from so much. He sighed softly, lifting a hand. “… Hey, you’re safe, Tseng. They’re gone now.” He added gently._ _

__That seemed to do it. Tseng lunged forward, burying his face in Reno’s neck and bursting into tears, sobbing against him. Reno instantly wrapped his arms around him, hugging him tightly. He didn’t speak, but his expression was dark as he heard Tseng’s breathless sobs. He had gone through so much- and had refused to speak about it to any of them. But he had spent the past few days almost falling asleep on his feet, which was why Reno had insisted they sleep together at least for one night._ _

__“- So sorry.” Tseng’s voice brought Reno back to the current moment, and he paused. An apology? For what?_ _

__“… Huh?” He titled his head a bit. “… Boss?”_ _

__“I’m so sorry.” Tseng said through his sobs. “I fucked up, Reno. I fucked up the mission, I put you all at risk- They used my phone, I let them-“_ _

__“Fuck no.” Reno growled, his arms only tightening around the other as he held him closer, cutting him off from the bullshit apology was sure Tseng was going to continue. He was infuriated that Tseng felt he was to blame for any of it, when he was nothing but a mere victim in whatever sick shit they had done to him- and to Elena, of course. “You didn’t do shit, Tseng. You aren’t at fault for anything that happened,” he began, trying his best to control the tone of his voice— He was mad, but his anger wasn’t directed at Tseng. It never was. But in his current state he knew Tseng wouldn’t hear that. “What happened was their fault. Not yours. You’re okay, I’m here. I’m here, I’ve got you….” He continued to soothe him, the sight of his usually composed, stern and confident leader broke his heart and he wished, more than anything, he could have been the one at the receiving end, instead of him._ _

__“Reno… I was shot and I ended up getting captured by the enemy.” Tseng protested, pulled back to wipe at his eyes. He knew Reno was trying to comfort him, but he still couldn’t shake the fact that he had been the one caught off guard, that it was him who Elena had turned back for at the crater. “That-”_ _

__“That doesn’t mean shit, yo.” Reno cut him off again. He thought back to when he had seen Tseng’s number come up, how his blood had run cold hearing not Tseng’s voice, but Kadaj’s on the other end, demanded to speak with Rufus. “You nearly fuckin died out there, Tseng. You protected Elena and risked your life to do so. The only bit of information you even gave them was your phone. You’re gonna really come out here and tell me that you’re fuckin weak or something?”_ _

__Tseng stared at him and reached a hand up to touch his cheek. “…. Reno you just don’t stop cursing ever do you?” He whispered jokingly, smiling a little at the small grin it earned him. “Thank you, for that. I really do appreciate it.”_ _

__“Yeah, of course you do.” Reno tilted his head, kissing the palm of his hand. “…. You want me to get you some tea? A snack?” He pressed as Tseng shook his head a bit. “… You wanna just lay here then?” He asked gently, and smiled as the other nodded, hiding his face in his neck. “Mm… Babe you know I love you. I’m not gonna leave you and I’ll stay up as long as you need. I’m not gonna let anyone hurt you or do anything to you again, like that. I promise.” He rambled softly, listening as Tseng’s breathing slowly evened out and he passed out again._ _

__Reno didn’t fall back asleep however as he made sure they were both comfortable laying down. Blue eyes flicked to the time and he sighed softly as he sent a text to Rufus. Unprofessional, yeah, but Tseng had only just fallen back asleep again, and he wasn’t going to wake him up in a few hours just to start working. Rufus would understand why they were taking the time off, he hoped as he wrapped his arms around Tseng, petting his hair. “Man, I just wish I could have something more for you, babycakes.” He mumbled softly as Tseng sighed in his sleep. Reno kissed the top of his head and closed his eyes, waiting for the other to wake up again. Whether from another nightmare or actually getting up, he wasn’t going to let go of him again._ _

**Author's Note:**

> Im so happy how this things came out. Thank you so much for reading it!!


End file.
